History's Dumpster = GLORIOUS trash! Kitsch, music, fashion, food, history, ephemera, and other memorable and forgotten, famous and infamous pop culture junk and oddities of yesterday and today. Saved from the landfill of time...
In the sudden aftermath of the Kennedy assassination. a flurry of tribute albums to JFK were released.
Several labels participated, but it was mostly the budget labels, such as Synthetic Plastics Company (which distributed two albums on the Diplomat and Premier labels), Pickwick had a version as well as Crown Records and a few majors such as Columbia, RCA Red Seal and Decca.
They were mostly recordings of Kennedy's greatest speeches. Most sold for 99¢ and proceeds from these records went to benefit The John F. Kennedy Council on Mental Retardation.
Many people have asked me if these albums were valuable monetarily and to be honest, they're not. All of these recordings are now public domain and widely available through several download sites (including US government archive sites) or on YouTube. Sealed mint copies go for as low as $15 and copies in any condition could be easily found in most thrift stores, as millions were sold in the months following the Kennedy assassination.
Well, actually it's kind of a long story. You see, according to Opal Covey, she is supposed to be mayor of Toledo. Right now. But for the past few elections, they have all been "rigged" against her, in spite of Covey never receiving more than 400 votes in the last mayoral elections she's run in.
Covey's platform is an interesting one to say the least. It consists of building an amusement park on three acres of land in downtown Toledo (surrounded by a parking garage which sits on far more space than this entire proposed amusement park.) And others on similarly sized lots of vacant property in downtown Toledo, claiming it would somehow make Toledo a hot tourist destination.
I can't even fit my attitude on three acres.
Yet she insists there's enough room for several full size carnival rides, arenas, ticket booths, concessions, game booths and porta-potties on these three acres. As well as the thousands of visitors she's expecting to flock to this particular amusement park (did I mention all this is supposed to be on three acres?)
O...K then. But folks, you ain't seen nothing yet.
A few weeks ago on Fred LeFebvre's morning show on Toledo news/talk station WSPD, Opal Covey was invited to discuss her plan on his show. And when Fred asked her to be specific about the physics and means of this particular amusement park in comparison to outlying amusement parks in the Toledo area, she...
This wasn't the end of it. As LeFebvre was escorting Opal Covey out of the station building after the interview. Well, this happened. Perhaps the damnedest thing you'll see all year.
But just for the sake of sheer fun, let's pretend she was actually elected mayor of Toledo. What could we expect from an Opal Covey administration?
- Well, needless to say, Toledo's Public Access TV channel will get a HUGE ratings boost. Why watch any of these crappy new sitcoms on the broadcast/cable TV networks or Netflix when the funniest damn comedyin America is the city council meetings on Toledo Public Access TV?
- The natural laws of geometry, physics, dimension and space (and possibly gravity) are about to be overturned by the Covey administration to accommodate Mayor Covey's three acre amusement park plan. Suck it Nye and deGrasse-Tyson.
- Wiping the dust off your feet will become the latest dance craze.
- Local signs in the Toledo area will be in English and Tongues.
I think this very well may be Opal Covey's year. With all the media attention she's been getting recently, she may very well crack that 400 vote ceiling.
I'm not a fan of Republican politicians (they're all bull moose nuts as far as I'm concerned.) But if I lived in Toledo, she'd definitely have my vote. If only for the amusement value in Opal Covey alone, regardless of her amusement park plans.
We'll all just have to wait until next Tuesday to find out how she fared. I'll keep you updated on the Facebook page. Be sure to Like. There's links to current news stories in the world of pop culture and oddities as well as vintage photos and other memorabilia.
Apparently, there was supposed to be a meteor or an asteroid crashing into planet Earth. And God and his angels would blow their trumpets and we'll all be treated to the end of all humanity in a horrific catastrophe with a nice jazzy soundtrack. Or something to that effect.
The internet is filled with crazy videos and websites from wacky conspiracy theorists claiming that "The End Times" are coming.
You'll have to pardon me if I'm not much fun here. I've seen and heard it all. You can only see and hear so much of this nonsense before you just get bored of it (and before anyone starts firing off any comments about repentance and it's-for-real and you-just-wait, save your breath. Or keystrokes.)
You can't set an exact date on such a thing either.
But fear in America isn't just an emotion. It's a big industry. Politicians use fear to get votes. Radio and TV personalities use fear to get ratings and sales. And people on the internet like spreading fear for fun. Which translates into dollars for enterprising scam artists that feed off the money of the fearful, who are often the same people who tout the virtues of "freedom and liberty" (or the far-right version of it.) Which is odd because you can't have either if you're always scared.
Nibiru is an alleged planet that every year since 2003 was supposed to crash into Earth or tilt its rotational axis, causing the usual global catastrophe.
Much of this is spread further by radio hosts such as Art Bell, George Noory and
Alex Jones, who host syndicated radio talk programs to audiences who
are looking for something to justify their own delusions about "The Great Unknown" or "What The Government Won't Tell You". Who then make
outlandish videos for YouTube and websites supporting the theories these hosts entertain or these individuals add their own twist to them.
Religious people especially like to get people worked up over doom and gloom. And for the same reason; It makes money. Hundreds of books have been written on "The End Times", some of them New York Times bestsellers.
In 2011, evangelical broadcaster Harold Camping made an infamous prediction over his Family Radio network of stations predicting the return of Jesus Christ on May 21, 2011. This prompted many employees and listeners of Family Radio to sell or donate their worldly possessions in anticipation of "The End".
When this did not materialize, Camping pushed back the date by five months to October 21,2011. When nothing happened on this date, Camping quickly disappeared from the airwaves, replaced by reruns of his own program. Camping died on December 15, 2013. He is survived by the world. The failure of his predictions as well as falling listener donations have led to the sale of many of his radio stations.
But as any of you who have had to deal with friends or relatives who were panicky about the whole "Y2K" debacle, you begin to seriously wonder if there needs to be a law requiring a disclaimer to all these programs and websites to at least protect the mentally unstable (which will surely cause stock in tinfoil to collapse.)
Then when nothing happens, they scramble for some explanation to save their asses. Which makes them and those that believed in them the first time around look even more foolish.
Personally, the only thing that can really destroy the Earth is the greed of the human race itself. Not some bipolar "god". Or things from outer space. But as long as there are fragile minded, easily terrified people, there will be always be someone trying to exploit that fear.
And as I speak, there's someone out there making up another end of the world story. And this time, it's for real. It's the big one. You better get ready this time.
Scott Beach was a DJ for legendary San Fransisco Classical radio station KKHI when he recorded this now long out of print spoken word single, which also appeared on Dr. Demento's Dementia Royale LP, also out of print.
How many words can you say with just one breath of air?......
If there is one post on this blog that has gotten indisputably the most views of all, it is the Forgotten Cigarette Brands post, scoring nearly 27,000 views (and the most comments ever) in the two years it's been published.
For those who enjoyed that post, I'm happy to inform you I've only scratched the surface. It's a smoker's goldmine out there and I had been planning some sequels.
So back to the cigarette aisle of yesteryear.......
Magna (Late 1980s) - Magna as I remember was pretty harsh tasting discount brand (we used to call it "Magma") targeted to young men. They were the brand you bought when you didn't have enough to buy Marlboro or Camel. But didn't want to be seen with a generic brand cigarette.
Mapleton (1970s?) - This one was a "flavoured" cigarette, blending maple and rum with tobacco to give it a taste I shudder to think. This wouldn't be the only one - or the most extreme. There was also...
Twist (1970s) Twist was - brace yourself, a LEMON flavored MENTHOL. Gives "pucker up" a brand new meaning.
Cambridge (1980s) Cambridge was a discount brand that tasted like a Merit clone. I actually liked Cambridge. But they vanished by the early '90s.
Now (1980s) A low tar brand.
Bucks (1990s) was a '90s discount brand. Not the greatest smoke. But it worked when you needed the nicotine.....
Free (Early 1980s) - To quote Dorothy Parker "What fresh hell is THIS?"A NON-TOBACCO cigarette? Yup, Free was the brand you sought when Carlton was simply too much. I tried a Free back in 1981 and I gagged. I mean upchuck gagged. They were the worst EVER. Free didn't last long (obviously), first, they were horrible. Second, they got shoplifted a lot by unsuspecting smokers ("But officer, it says it's 'Free'!" If I were a cop, I'd have let the shoplifter go and let karma do it's job.) And having no nicotine and questionable ingredients was a total buzzkill. And finally, you could legally sell these to kids, as it contained no tobacco and nicotine (therefore, no warning label either.) This upset a lot of parents. And Free vanished.
Go To Hell! (1983) - Go To Hell! (There, that settles it) was a novelty brand for pissed off smokers. In the early '80s, legislation in more and more states began limiting where you could or could not smoke. Up to then, it wasn't uncommon to see ashtrays in stores, hotels, beauty salons, city buses, airplanes, restaurants and virtually everywhere - even in doctor's officers and hospitals, you saw smokers everywhere happily puffing away. Well the non smokers began putting the kibosh on that in earnest. Starting with airplanes and little by little, the stores, buses, hotels, hospitals, everywhere became off-limits to the cigarette puffers, first in designated areas, and finally outdoors, then 25 feet away from building doors/windows. Then the restaurants and bars fell and today, it's against most apartment leases to smoke inside your own home. Well in 1983, some big tobacco companies smokers weren't going to take it. And they rebelled with a campaign for smokers to begin demanding their rights. And nothing brings about a friendly, intelligent, civil discourse like "Go To Hell!". Unfortunately for the smokers, the tide was turning irrevocably and now it's getting nearly impossible to smoke anywhere (In Seattle, they've recently began banning smoking in public parks.) Even though smokers are running out of places to smoke, I don't think tobacco will ever be made illegal. We're slowly ending one black market over one plant (marijuana) and quite successfully. We don't need to be creating another.
Campaign Cigarettes - Yes, you could even vote with your lungs as late as 1988. Even at that time, these weren't anything new, they were used in campaigns going back to Eisenhower/Stevenson. Nixon also freely handed them to his campaign workers.
It all started with a fairly run of the mill TV commercial for national fast food chain Wendy's....
....that turned three words into the national catch phrase of 1984. And launched a tiny octogenarian lady named Clara Peller into viral superstardom.
This wasn't Clara Peller's only commercial. She starred in a few others prior to the Wendy's ads.
The Wendy's commercial debuted on January 10, 1984 and instantly caught on nationwide. Leading to several sequels to the original Wendy's commercial and a simply massive merchandising blitz.
She also had a small radio hit, which sampled her "Where's The Beef" phrase. Copies of the single were sold at Wendy's.
"Where's The Beef" Coyote McCloud feat. Clara Peller (1984)
The "Where's The Beef" commercials and product tie-ins made millions for Wendy's and brought them out of a deep sales slump. According to Wendy's, Clara Peller made $500,000 from the commercials, a number Clara Peller herself had disputed.
It even became a political comeback when former vice President and Democratic challenger to President Reagan, Walter Mondale used this line against his Democratic primary challenger Gary Hart.
However, the "Where's The Beef" mania didn't last long. (Oversaturation, as you can clearly see here, has a way of doing that.) But Clara Peller thought her Wendy's contract allowed her to do commercials for other products that didn't directly compete with Wendy's, such as Prego spaghetti sauce. Not so. Lawyers for Wendy's insisted "Where's the beef" meant ONLY Wendy's hamburgers and she was released from her contract.
She went on to use variants of the line in movies, TV and other commercials. But with no mention of the word "beef".
Here's a clip from the movie "Moving Violations", where she stars opposite Nedra Volz ("Different Strokes")
Clara Peller died on August 11, 1987, a week after her 85th birthday.
You know Bernie Sanders as America's Senator, the lovable underdog determined to take on the Koch brothers, corporate greed mongers and corrupt government policy.
But did you know he has a musical side?
Bernie released this cassette album in 1987, Side One is a mix of traditional folk covers, Side Two is a recorded conversation with Bernie.
