History's Dumpster = GLORIOUS trash! Kitsch, music, fashion, food, history, ephemera, and other memorable and forgotten, famous and infamous pop culture junk and oddities of yesterday and today. Saved from the landfill of time...
Danka was a tragically named breakfast pastry for toasters that existed in the late 1960s and early '70s.
From the advertising, Danka was for your square, sensible middle aged person who wanted their toaster pastries to do more than pop up. (Well, what do you want them to do then? Your taxes?)
In 1973, Jack In The Box ran a TV
commercial for it's Jumbo Jack burger featuring a cute little
kid named Rodney Allen Rippy, who held the Jumbo Jack in his hands
and said "It's too big to eat!". But being a little kid, it came out as "It's too big-a eat!". It became a national catch-phrase in 1973-1974.
This led to a 45 RPM single with Bell
Records called "Take Life A Little Easier". At age five, he also became the youngest person ever to have a Billboard charting pop hit. A record that to this very day, remains unbroken.
So whatever happened to Rodney Allen Rippy?
Well according to his website, after his Jack In The Box commercial run, he starred in other commercials, including Nehi soda, Chevrolet and others. He graduated from California State University, Dominguez Hills in 1995.He's taken on a few TV acting roles since his childhood stardom backin the early 1990s and appeared in the 2003 David Spade comedy Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star. He also hosted a Los Angeles radio talk show.
Contrary to many internet hoaxes and urban legends, Rodney Allen Rippy is still very much alive and well. He was badly injured in a bike crash in 2010, but he's fully recovered.
Ahhh....Another peaceful Sunday morning. Time to put on some nice, relaxing easy going music. Right?
Well I'm having none of it. It's time to crank it up full blast and wake up the neighbours with some truly awesome music. The stuff you just won't hear on the radio. Anywhere.
Outsider musicians are those folks who simply make music
the only way they know how. With very little to no musical training
whatsoever. The conventional requisites of stardom are simply unheard of among
outsider musicians.
This is not American Idol. There is no competition. Or critiquing. Or even practicing and rehearsals. What you hear is what you get.
They simply don't care about commercial success. Or
any musical conventionality even amateur musicians adhere strictly to. They make their
music on their own whims and for the sheer sake of their own personal enjoyment. Even if the only one enjoying it
is themselves, they wouldn't care.
It also differs from vanity acts. Vanity acts actively look for a commercial breakthrough and exposure to the masses. Most outsider acts would never be heard at all were it not for certain friends and associates encouraging them to take a leap of faith and record their material.
Sometimes a major label finds them, but that's usually a by-product of local press buzz or through chance contacts. The labels never seek outsider musicians and outsider musicians never seek the labels. If planets align, they align. But that's very rare if they do. The major labels want something that delivers a massive return on whatever investment they make. And that's something no outsider act has ever really done.
Outsider music isn't even a conscientious rebellion against mainstream rock and pop's status quo, which usually drives most hardcore independent lo-fi punk bands. They truly believe in what they are doing in spite of what anyone thinks. They simply let their dim lights shine.
But what may sound like tone-deaf psychiatric patients (some, but not all outsider musicians suffer from some sort of severe mental illness) to
the rest of us is technically a sub-sub genre of Alternative rock. It's not even a "new" thing ("Wild Man" Fischer, whom Frank Zappa discovered in the late 1960s, is a pioneer. So is David Peel, whom John Lennon discovered and released a few albums of his on the Beatles' Apple label in the early '70s, The Shaggs and to some extent, even Charles Manson.)
Today, we're going head first into the most obscure of obscure music genres. But like most of my posts here, I don't disclose everything. I like to leave some of it out for you, the reader, to explore on your own. I just merely set up the launch pad for your own journey (it might be one-way.) So this is not a complete list. Not by far. But it's enough to give a basic
insight into this strange genre. Google "Outsider music", if you're
really curious.
Bingo Gazingo
Sweet dreams, ladies.....
Bingo Gazingo (Murray Wachs, 1924-2010) was an elderly New York City outsider musician and poet with perhaps more punk rock authenticity than any band that ever played at CBGB's. And I mean all of them. He was, perhaps literally, the grandfather of punk.
With song titles like "Oh Madonna, You Stole My Pants", "Up Your Jurassic Park" and "I Love You So Fucking Much, I Can't Shit", you pretty much get the idea this was no ordinary retired postal worker from Queens.
He released an album through WFMU Radio in 1996 and this song, "You're Out of The Computer" was a collaboration with techno artist My Robot Friend (Howard Rigberg) from My Robot Friend's 2004 CD Hot Action! It also appears on the Songs in The Key of Z compilation of outsider music.
Tragically, Bingo Gazingo was struck down by a cab on his way to a performance at the Bowery Poetry Club where he appeared weekly every Monday night in November of 2009. He died of his injuries on New Year's Day, 2010. He was 85.
Wesley Willis
Wesley Willis (1963-2003) could be the most famousof outsider musicians, even garnering some airplay on mainstream alternative rock radio in the 1990s.
His story began as one of ten children born in a dysfunctional family (having so many siblings can throw even the most stable family off - think the Duggars) in the housing projects of Chicago. He spent most of his life going from foster home to foster home with two older brothers as their parents had a violent relationship and split up when Wesley was a child.
In spite of this horrific background, Wesley seemed to be a bright and fairly normal young man. However on October 21, 1989 (there are people who remember this specific date), he began to hear voices in his head, which he called "demons" and was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia.
About this time, he also began making music. Mostly as an outlet to escape the turmoil inside his head. He also made artwork and was discovered by members of Chicago's alternative rock scene, who encouraged his musical pursuits. This led to a collaboration called The Wesley Willis Fiasco and he actually became a sensation in the Chicago alternative underground, gaining attention from major label American Recordings, which was distributed by Warner Bros.
His favourite greeting wasn't a handshake or a hug. It was a headbutt to the forehead. I am not making that up. This left a permanent bruise on his forehead.
His music was crude, rambling and often profane. One unique characteristic of Wesley Willis is no matter what song he's performing, they all sound identical to each other. They mostly are songs about things that he had personally identified with in his life. Such as his local McDonald's, bands and stars such as Pink Floyd, Foo Fighters, Kurt Cobain and whatever else figured.
Here's a sample of what that sounded like
He eventually recorded 50 albums from 1994 until his untimely death in 2003 from leukemia. He was 40.
Daniel Johnston
Daniel Johnston, like Wesley Willis, also suffers from schizophrenia and like Willis, also uses music as a way to cope with it. Johnston is also a visual artist as well. However Johnston is different in the sense that his music is more introspective and melodic than either Wesley Willis or Bingo Gazingo. He's been called a "fractured genius" and "the indie Brian Wilson". He quite possibly could have achieved mainstream stardom and in fact, he came quite close to it.
Daniel Johnston began recording music as a teenager on a boombox at home in the late '70s. By the early '80s, he was self releasing his own material. He moved to Austin and appeared on MTV in 1985, which gained him further exposure. He went on to make more recordings, including collaborations with Sonic Youth, Half Japanese and other indie acts, who became fans of his.
But his schizophrenia was also worsening. In 1990, on the way to West Virginia on a small, private two-seater plane piloted by his father Bill, Johnston had a manic psychotic episode believing he was Casper the Friendly Ghost
and removed the key from the plane's ignition and threw it out of the
plane. His father, a former Air Force pilot, managed to successfully
crash-land the plane, even though "there was nothing down there but
trees". Although the plane was destroyed, Johnston and his father
emerged with only minor injuries. As a result of this episode, Johnston
was involuntarily committed to a mental hospital.
In the early '90s, Kurt Cobain was often seen wearing a t-shirt with the cover image of Johnston's 1983 album Hi, How Are You? on it.
Which lead to even more interest in Daniel Johnston. Even while involuntarily committed at the mental hospital, Warner Music label Elektra Records was interested in signing him, but he refused the deal as Elektra then was also the label home of Metallica, whom Johnston thought worshipped Satan.
Eventually he signed with Warner co-owned Atlantic Records, which released his only major label LP Fun in 1995. The album flopped commercially and Atlantic ended his contract in 1996.
In 2005, a full length documentary DVD on Daniel Johnston's life The Devil and Daniel Johnston was released.
Johnston is still active in music.
Jandek
To say Jandek is merely an outsider musician just doesn't quite cut it. In fact, he's been described as "The Rock N' Roll J.D. Salinger". Because he's perhaps the most reclusive of all the outsider musicians.
Yet he has released over 70 albums on the mail order Corwood Industries label. A label that while Jandek maintains a certain distance from professionally, has only issued Jandek material. And he has a surprisingly loyal and solid worldwide fan base. With almost no radio airplay or any promotion of any kind.
Most Jandek albums feature a young man on the covers in random photo shots and when you lay them out, you realize they are the same person - Jandek himself? Possibly.
But nothing has been directly confirmed by Jandek - he's only done a few interviews. But in rare recent pictures of Jandek, you do see a very strong, even uncanny resemblance.
Jandek's actual name has never been confirmed directly either, but he's believed to be Sterling Smith and he was born in 1945. Other than that, very little else is known about him. And that's how he likes it.
His music is a sort of psychedelic country-blues. But even that description isn't quite accurate. Jandek is a genre all to himself.
Jandek is an enigma even by outsider music standards. And that's saying something. In 2003, he released Jandek on Corwood, a documentary DVD that doesn't answer even the most basic questions of his life his fans always wanted to know. But then again, that mystique is still a part of his attraction.
He's still active, releasing an album or two a year and occasionally touring.
In the late 1990s, before cell phone service became affordable and nearly ubiquitous for nearly everyone, there were dozens of phone numbers offering super cheap long distance and other gimmicks via a 10-10 prefix number for land line phones. (Image: Chris Stewart/The San Francisco Chronicle)
The 1990s were the last decade where home land line phones were still dominant. Cell phones were still prohibitively expensive, very few people had them and they had no features. Just voice.
In the 1990s, there was no unlimited talk, text messaging was still mostly unheard of and there was no mobile web/data access either. Charges for voice calls were still by the minute and at the rate of $2 per minute, they added up real fast. Plus you needed a perfect credit score or a massively huge deposit to even get cell phone service.
So the land line phone was status quo for most people. Which meant if you had to call someone in a different area code, you had to pay by the minute for it, often at the rate of 25¢ to as high as $1.00 per minute (or more!) for international calls. However after 7pm local time and on weekends, these rates came down, but not by much.
In 2015, with the concept of area codes considered nearly obsolete (I live in the Seattle area and my cell phone number has a 415 - that's San Francisco, area code - long story, but no problems thus far) and nearly unlimited everything on your smartphone and zillions of apps you can do nearly everything with for around $30 month, it's hard for most younger people to imagine such a backwards and expensive system. But that's really how it was back in the day.
But to get a further glimpse into our topic, you need to go back even farther.
Making a long distance call in most of the 20th century was a complicated procedure. On top of expensive. Plus, there was only one provider of cross country long distance. It was called The Bell System (it's also been referred to as "Ma Bell" because of the ubiquitously female phone operators and automated voices. Plus it was the "mother" of the entire American phone system and dated all the way back to the very first telephone system in the 1870s.)
There were a few companies that provided local and regional phone service, such as GTE (the predecessor to today's Verizon.) But most long distance calls went through The Bell System.
But in spite of the Bell System's snazzy, friendly commercials and happy brochures, they could charge whatever they wanted if your call went through their lines. Because screw you. That's why. They were a monopoly, they set the rates, they provided the means of communication. There was no competition. So whaddya gonna do about it? Punk.
It frustrated millions of Americans who longed for some level of competition and better rates. So if you wanted to cheaply talk to friends and family across the miles in the days long before the internet, email and social media and today's smartphone services, you had to rely on old fashioned snail mail. Which took days or even weeks to arrive. And breaking family news and emergencies just couldn't wait. But more than anything else, people just wanted to hear the voices of their loved ones far away.
In 1984, the U.S. Justice Department ruled what everyone knew for over 100 years, that the Bell System was indeed a monopoly and ordered the break up of Ma Bell. This led to a flurry of complicated and strange new providers such as US Sprint (later just Sprint) and the now defunct MCI. And Ma Bell became AT&T.
This did lead to more competitive rates, but barely. The initial long distance rates of these new providers were in reality not much different than Ma Bell's. And sometimes, depending on where you were calling, they were even more expensive. The Telecommunications Act of 1996 led to yet even further fragmenting to the land line telephone systems.
A typical landline phone of the '90s. By this time, cordless phones had begun to overtake corded models.
The 10-10 numbers were created by the newly minted sub-long distance provider US Telecom (then a subsidiary of MCI, now operated by Verizon) as a workaround to your regular home long distance provider. Offering rates as low as 10¢ per minute. Which was actually not a bad rate for 1998 home long distance. Plus they were the same rate, 24/7. No need to wait until after hours.
But by 2004, these services themselves were becoming increasingly antiquated as cell phone services became more and more affordable and offered far more than the standard land line could provide. And even the 10-10 numbers began increasing rates to compensate. First to 18¢ and now at 30¢.
Surprisingly, some of these 10-10 dial-around land line services are still in business today, even as the use of land lines has dropped dramatically and land lines today are mostly used by businesses, the elderly and the vision and hearing impaired today. But 30¢ is a crazy rate to pay per minute for domestic long distance in 2015 when most people don't even pay for it at all. It just comes gratis with their cell phone service.
(Note: I know I'm probably going to hear from those who still have land lines about their virtues and yes, they do have clearer sound and one major benefit. When power is out, the phone lines - with corded phones - usually still work as their source of power is within the phone line itself and in areas that are disaster prone, that's a major benefit. But Seattle rarely has extreme weather or natural disasters. So I can live without one. Just the thought of having to go back to the Luddite old system just gives me the creeps - L.W.)
Apparently, there was supposed to be a meteor or an asteroid crashing into planet Earth. And God and his angels would blow their trumpets and we'll all be treated to the end of all humanity in a horrific catastrophe with a nice jazzy soundtrack. Or something to that effect.
The internet is filled with crazy videos and websites from wacky conspiracy theorists claiming that "The End Times" are coming.
You'll have to pardon me if I'm not much fun here. I've seen and heard it all. You can only see and hear so much of this nonsense before you just get bored of it (and before anyone starts firing off any comments about repentance and it's-for-real and you-just-wait, save your breath. Or keystrokes.)
You can't set an exact date on such a thing either.
But fear in America isn't just an emotion. It's a big industry. Politicians use fear to get votes. Radio and TV personalities use fear to get ratings and sales. And people on the internet like spreading fear for fun. Which translates into dollars for enterprising scam artists that feed off the money of the fearful, who are often the same people who tout the virtues of "freedom and liberty" (or the far-right version of it.) Which is odd because you can't have either if you're always scared.
Nibiru is an alleged planet that every year since 2003 was supposed to crash into Earth or tilt its rotational axis, causing the usual global catastrophe.
Much of this is spread further by radio hosts such as Art Bell, George Noory and
Alex Jones, who host syndicated radio talk programs to audiences who
are looking for something to justify their own delusions about "The Great Unknown" or "What The Government Won't Tell You". Who then make
outlandish videos for YouTube and websites supporting the theories these hosts entertain or these individuals add their own twist to them.
Religious people especially like to get people worked up over doom and gloom. And for the same reason; It makes money. Hundreds of books have been written on "The End Times", some of them New York Times bestsellers.
In 2011, evangelical broadcaster Harold Camping made an infamous prediction over his Family Radio network of stations predicting the return of Jesus Christ on May 21, 2011. This prompted many employees and listeners of Family Radio to sell or donate their worldly possessions in anticipation of "The End".
When this did not materialize, Camping pushed back the date by five months to October 21,2011. When nothing happened on this date, Camping quickly disappeared from the airwaves, replaced by reruns of his own program. Camping died on December 15, 2013. He is survived by the world. The failure of his predictions as well as falling listener donations have led to the sale of many of his radio stations.
But as any of you who have had to deal with friends or relatives who were panicky about the whole "Y2K" debacle, you begin to seriously wonder if there needs to be a law requiring a disclaimer to all these programs and websites to at least protect the mentally unstable (which will surely cause stock in tinfoil to collapse.)
Then when nothing happens, they scramble for some explanation to save their asses. Which makes them and those that believed in them the first time around look even more foolish.
Personally, the only thing that can really destroy the Earth is the greed of the human race itself. Not some bipolar "god". Or things from outer space. But as long as there are fragile minded, easily terrified people, there will be always be someone trying to exploit that fear.
And as I speak, there's someone out there making up another end of the world story. And this time, it's for real. It's the big one. You better get ready this time.
It's 1985 and you're flipping through the late night TV channels, looking for a late movie or some kind of background noise to do whatever else. And you land on some crazy local UHF TV channel. Which is showing this infomercial.
Don't forget your "Scream Bag" (Photo: Peter L. Walsh/Baltimore or Less)
It's right here you wonder what the hell you are watching. And who (or what) the hell is Santo Gold? Is it jewelry? Some unknown rock star with a penchant for randomly screaming his own name? A factory with a boiler room office? A wrestling federation? A horror movie? A paper bag? WHAT?
I remember seeing this infomercial back then and for decades and even now, adjectives still fail me. But we aren't over yet. Here's the second half of the infomercial.
- Santo Gold was cheap steel costume jewelry coated with a microscopically thin coating of gold. People who were considering purchasing these things during the infomercial were encouraged to buy larger sets to sell at flea markets (as opposed at real jewelry stores.) They also came in spools to make custom length necklaces.
Phil Spector saw Santo Gold's look on TV, looked in the mirror and had an epiphany.
- "Santo Gold", the alleged rock star was Santo Victor Rigatuso. The creator of Santo Gold (the jewelry) and financier of an upcoming B-horror/comedy movie called Blood Circus. Rigatuso also went by the less ethnic sounding Bob Harris (are you still with me?)
To my knowledge, there were no known documented studio recordings by anyone named Santo Gold in 1985 or before. Nothing on the Billboard Top 40/Album Rock charts or radio playlists of 1984/1985 refer to Santo Gold (there was an album by Santana, but nothing from Santo Gold.) Which makes his credentials as "rock star" a stretch. And his music ("?") wasn't even rock. From the infomercials, the song he sings sounds like a jewelry advertisement as sung by Disco Tex & The Sex-O-Lettes.
- Blood Circus was the movie that was to spread the Santo Gold gospel to the masses (once the infomercial blitz had paid off, I assume.) The plot was this; Alien wrestlers come to Earth to fight human wrestlers and promptly devour them before defeating them (rather than the more traditional method of defeating them before devouring them.) The movie was filmed at Baltimore Civic Center (now Royal Farms Arena) and was billed as a wrestling event and movie filming. The audience actually had to pay $10 each to attend. Some bit-part actors were actually paid off only in Santo Gold jewelry!
- The "Scream Bag" was a paper bag.
We don't know much more about this particular mess beyond that. We honestly don't. There are no known copies of the film and what known footage exists only on the scratchy, pixellated YouTube videos of the infomercials.
Some money from the jewelry came in. But by 1987, he still hadn't found any distribution for Blood Circus. He could have also gone straight to the then very lucrative VHS home video market with Blood Circus (which would have been perhaps the best alternate route.) Rigatuso did not. Finally, there was a showing for one week only at selected Baltimore area theatres. But according to one source, only three people showed up; Two reviewers and an extra from the filming.
When Blood Circus failed to get anywhere. Rigatuso later went into finance with a paper credit card for $49.99. Redeemable only for the Santo Gold jewelry he was probably still up to here with by then. He later began advertising alleged $2000 chunks of a millionaire's estate for an unbelievable $52 each.
I guess it was unbelievable, as he was finally convicted of mail fraud in 1989 and sentenced to 10 months in prison. That would be the end of the whole Santo Gold fiasco, right?
Nope.
In 2008 he finally recorded that elusive album we never saw in the '80s, titled I Am The Real Santo Gold. (No word from Slim Shady - aka Eminem.) One of the songs was a tribute to Donald Trump ("You're Fired") and another was titled "Obama Stomp".
In 2009, a female pop singer named Santogold was forced to change her stage name to Santigold, due to legal pressure from Rigatuso.
And then there was this.
There was an ad that appeared on eBay in 2011. The ad was selling a 35mm film copy of the Blood Circus movie. And starting bid was $21 million. Reserve price? $750 million.
Let's simplify this; The 1997 movie Titanic and one of the biggest grossing movies of all time costed $200 million to make. Blood Circus reportedly costed $2 million.
So until there is a complete, viewable and verified print of this film (and expectations considerably lowered.), the legend of Santo Gold's Blood Circus will only remain in cheesy '80s obscurity.
Today, I thought I'd dig up a little chestnut I rediscovered by way of a buddy when we sat up talking about lost and forgotten new wave classics. Whilst talking about the German bands and artists, this guy came up.
I will never forget the first time I saw Klaus Nomi. It was an early Sunday morning in 1982 and I was watching MTV for as long as I can before my mom assumed control of the TV for her religious shows.
Then this video came on. And I immediately saw his genius. (Or at least after I spit out my Grape Nuts.)
Yes, one minute he was channeling Joel Grey, the next, Beverly Sills. But more than anything else he was making his male pattern baldness work for him.
Not even Phil Collins could do that.
Normally, balding male pop singers grudging accept their follicle fates and pluck it all off eventually. Or hide it under cowboy hats. Not Klaus Nomi. He used his to become the human embodiment of Astro-Boy.
He also simply had the greatest rendition of "You Don't Own Me". Ever.
It all started with a fairly run of the mill TV commercial for national fast food chain Wendy's....
....that turned three words into the national catch phrase of 1984. And launched a tiny octogenarian lady named Clara Peller into viral superstardom.
This wasn't Clara Peller's only commercial. She starred in a few others prior to the Wendy's ads.
The Wendy's commercial debuted on January 10, 1984 and instantly caught on nationwide. Leading to several sequels to the original Wendy's commercial and a simply massive merchandising blitz.
She also had a small radio hit, which sampled her "Where's The Beef" phrase. Copies of the single were sold at Wendy's.
"Where's The Beef" Coyote McCloud feat. Clara Peller (1984)
The "Where's The Beef" commercials and product tie-ins made millions for Wendy's and brought them out of a deep sales slump. According to Wendy's, Clara Peller made $500,000 from the commercials, a number Clara Peller herself had disputed.
It even became a political comeback when former vice President and Democratic challenger to President Reagan, Walter Mondale used this line against his Democratic primary challenger Gary Hart.
However, the "Where's The Beef" mania didn't last long. (Oversaturation, as you can clearly see here, has a way of doing that.) But Clara Peller thought her Wendy's contract allowed her to do commercials for other products that didn't directly compete with Wendy's, such as Prego spaghetti sauce. Not so. Lawyers for Wendy's insisted "Where's the beef" meant ONLY Wendy's hamburgers and she was released from her contract.
She went on to use variants of the line in movies, TV and other commercials. But with no mention of the word "beef".
Here's a clip from the movie "Moving Violations", where she stars opposite Nedra Volz ("Different Strokes")
Clara Peller died on August 11, 1987, a week after her 85th birthday.
