History's Dumpster = GLORIOUS trash! Kitsch, music, fashion, food, history, ephemera, and other memorable and forgotten, famous and infamous pop culture junk and oddities of yesterday and today. Saved from the landfill of time...
In the late 1970s, it seemed like The Chipmunks franchise was all but dead.
Ross Bagdasarian Sr., the Chipmunks creator had passed away in 1972 and aside from various licensed holiday repackagings for budget labels such as Mistletoe/Springboard, there was no new Chipmunks music in that cold, lonely decade.
Liberty Records had folded into United Artists in 1968 and UA wasn't as fond of these rodents as Liberty.
The '70s were a real low point for the Chipmunks. And to add insult to sad loss, a religious producer/musician named Floyd Robinson created something called Charlie The Hamster. A smug, born-again knockoff that served no other purpose other than to remind us of how much we really missed the actual Chipmunks.
Charlie The Hamster Sings The Ten Commandments (Singcord, 1977) is a headache inducing Christian market knockoff of the Chipmunks franchise. Somehow, Robinson and his hamster forgot about Commandment #8.....
But by 1980, the Chipmunks really needed a makeover and it was up to Ross Bagdasarian Jr. to carry the Chipmunks torch into the '80s. So he created Chipmunk Punk. And yes, even Yours Truly owned a copy.
Chipmunk Punk wasn't actual punk rock music per se. If you came here looking for some hysterical Chipmunk versions of The Sex Pistols, Anti-Nowhere League, The Ramones or The Dead Boys, you better move on.
But you did get Chipmunk covers of rock songs from The Knack (three songs were Knack covers!), Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers, Blondie, The Cars, Billy Joel, Linda Ronstadt and Queen. Sanitized of course (The Knack's "Good Girls Don't" was cleaned up - this is a kids record after all.)
The album was a surprising success and went Gold (the first Chipmunks album to do so.) The album was inspired by a DJ from Los Angeles rock station KMET-FM who played Blondie's "Call Me" at twice normal speed and jokingly called it "the new Chipmunks record".
Chipmunk Punk reintroduced the Chipmunks to a new generation and led to several follow up albums and a new Saturday morning cartoon series in the '80s and they're still active today.
Apparently, there was supposed to be a meteor or an asteroid crashing into planet Earth. And God and his angels would blow their trumpets and we'll all be treated to the end of all humanity in a horrific catastrophe with a nice jazzy soundtrack. Or something to that effect.
The internet is filled with crazy videos and websites from wacky conspiracy theorists claiming that "The End Times" are coming.
You'll have to pardon me if I'm not much fun here. I've seen and heard it all. You can only see and hear so much of this nonsense before you just get bored of it (and before anyone starts firing off any comments about repentance and it's-for-real and you-just-wait, save your breath. Or keystrokes.)
You can't set an exact date on such a thing either.
But fear in America isn't just an emotion. It's a big industry. Politicians use fear to get votes. Radio and TV personalities use fear to get ratings and sales. And people on the internet like spreading fear for fun. Which translates into dollars for enterprising scam artists that feed off the money of the fearful, who are often the same people who tout the virtues of "freedom and liberty" (or the far-right version of it.) Which is odd because you can't have either if you're always scared.
Nibiru is an alleged planet that every year since 2003 was supposed to crash into Earth or tilt its rotational axis, causing the usual global catastrophe.
Much of this is spread further by radio hosts such as Art Bell, George Noory and
Alex Jones, who host syndicated radio talk programs to audiences who
are looking for something to justify their own delusions about "The Great Unknown" or "What The Government Won't Tell You". Who then make
outlandish videos for YouTube and websites supporting the theories these hosts entertain or these individuals add their own twist to them.
Religious people especially like to get people worked up over doom and gloom. And for the same reason; It makes money. Hundreds of books have been written on "The End Times", some of them New York Times bestsellers.
In 2011, evangelical broadcaster Harold Camping made an infamous prediction over his Family Radio network of stations predicting the return of Jesus Christ on May 21, 2011. This prompted many employees and listeners of Family Radio to sell or donate their worldly possessions in anticipation of "The End".
When this did not materialize, Camping pushed back the date by five months to October 21,2011. When nothing happened on this date, Camping quickly disappeared from the airwaves, replaced by reruns of his own program. Camping died on December 15, 2013. He is survived by the world. The failure of his predictions as well as falling listener donations have led to the sale of many of his radio stations.
But as any of you who have had to deal with friends or relatives who were panicky about the whole "Y2K" debacle, you begin to seriously wonder if there needs to be a law requiring a disclaimer to all these programs and websites to at least protect the mentally unstable (which will surely cause stock in tinfoil to collapse.)
Then when nothing happens, they scramble for some explanation to save their asses. Which makes them and those that believed in them the first time around look even more foolish.
Personally, the only thing that can really destroy the Earth is the greed of the human race itself. Not some bipolar "god". Or things from outer space. But as long as there are fragile minded, easily terrified people, there will be always be someone trying to exploit that fear.
And as I speak, there's someone out there making up another end of the world story. And this time, it's for real. It's the big one. You better get ready this time.
Today, I thought I'd dig up a little chestnut I rediscovered by way of a buddy when we sat up talking about lost and forgotten new wave classics. Whilst talking about the German bands and artists, this guy came up.
I will never forget the first time I saw Klaus Nomi. It was an early Sunday morning in 1982 and I was watching MTV for as long as I can before my mom assumed control of the TV for her religious shows.
Then this video came on. And I immediately saw his genius. (Or at least after I spit out my Grape Nuts.)
Yes, one minute he was channeling Joel Grey, the next, Beverly Sills. But more than anything else he was making his male pattern baldness work for him.
Not even Phil Collins could do that.
Normally, balding male pop singers grudging accept their follicle fates and pluck it all off eventually. Or hide it under cowboy hats. Not Klaus Nomi. He used his to become the human embodiment of Astro-Boy.
He also simply had the greatest rendition of "You Don't Own Me". Ever.
Scott Beach was a DJ for legendary San Fransisco Classical radio station KKHI when he recorded this now long out of print spoken word single, which also appeared on Dr. Demento's Dementia Royale LP, also out of print.
How many words can you say with just one breath of air?......
"An Old Fashioned Christmas (Daddy's Home)" Linda Bennett (1975)
It starts out like your typical sleepy MOR Christmas ballad. But then comes the "Breaking News" radio reports. And from here, this record really goes to hell.
I'm not going to spoil it beyond that, but I would put this movie in my Netflix queue if I were you. FM was also the inspiration behind the legendary WKRP In Cincinnati.
FM also had one of the best soundtracks of any movie of the 1970s. It was a compilation loaded with original hits from the original artists on a two LP album set. In their full length album versions, not edited single versions (which besides FM radio's sound quality, the full versions of songs were also what made FM radio great in the 1970s.) And certainly not like a K-tel and Ronco record. The soundtrack was mastered by Gary Katz, the golden ears behind Steely Dan's classic '70s albums. It was truly one of the very best sounding soundtrack albums I have ever heard and MCA Records spared no expense in getting this right.
On the flipside, budget record label Pickwick Records tried to cash in on the popularity of FM's soundtrack with their typically crummy knockoff record of incredibly LOUSY cover versions of the FM soundtrack's hit songs.
....and I do mean lousy.
Listen to this hysterically bad cover of The Eagle's "Life In The Fast Lane"
Phil Phillips is best known for the 1959 ballad "Sea of Love", which got a revival in 1984 when it was covered by The Honeydrippers, a supergroup featuring Robert Plant and Jimmy Page (of Led Zeppelin), Nile Rodgers (of Chic) and Brian Setzer (of The Stray Cats.) But he had largely faded by 1968 when this anti-drug single came out.
In spite of all intentions, it became an underground radio comedy classic.
One of the BEST Halloween variety TV specials of the '70s. Starring Margaret Hamilton (reprising her role as The Wicked Witch from The Wizard of Oz), Betty White, Tim Conway, Roz Kelly, Billie Hayes, Billy Barty, Florence Henderson, an uncredited appearance from Donny & Marie Osmond and musical guest Kiss.
Sam Sacks was unquestionably an underrated musical genius. While Florence Foster Jenkins and Nina Hagen could sing a few notes on key once in a while. Sam Sacks' gift was he utterly could not. Even accidentally.
Inimitable he was. You just don't run into this utter lack of talent everyday.
Listen as he barnstorms through "Secret Love", "Diana", "That Old Black Magic" and many other 1940s and '50s pop standards. And I do mean barnstorm. You can't even get the first thought of an opinion together (due to your shock in hearing this) before he whips into another tune (imagine the feelings of the musicians trying to keep up with him!)
I'm not sure, but this sounds like it was recorded in one big harried take (you can hear him argue with the engineer - even retake "Secret Love".)
In 1981, a Dutch group called Stars On 45 made a horrifying disco-fied medley of Beatles songs that actually was a worldwide smash hit in June of that year (don't laugh, it actually went to #1 in the US.)
This is still the longest song title ever for a 45 RPM single at 41 words....
Bear in mind, these weren't the original Beatles recordings stringed together (EMI would NEVER have allowed that), but the Stars On 45s were pretty good imitators (or at least significantly better than anything you hear at the karaoke bar down the street) and they did fool quite a few people.
The success of Stars On 45 made them ripe for parody, which UK TV personality Ivor Biggun did with "Bras on 45". Ivor Biggun's parody on reached #50 in the UK and never charted in the US, but it was widely played on The Dr. Demento Show.
