History's Dumpster = GLORIOUS trash! Kitsch, music, fashion, food, history, ephemera, and other memorable and forgotten, famous and infamous pop culture junk and oddities of yesterday and today. Saved from the landfill of time...
In the late 1970s, it seemed like The Chipmunks franchise was all but dead.
Ross Bagdasarian Sr., the Chipmunks creator had passed away in 1972 and aside from various licensed holiday repackagings for budget labels such as Mistletoe/Springboard, there was no new Chipmunks music in that cold, lonely decade.
Liberty Records had folded into United Artists in 1968 and UA wasn't as fond of these rodents as Liberty.
The '70s were a real low point for the Chipmunks. And to add insult to sad loss, a religious producer/musician named Floyd Robinson created something called Charlie The Hamster. A smug, born-again knockoff that served no other purpose other than to remind us of how much we really missed the actual Chipmunks.
Charlie The Hamster Sings The Ten Commandments (Singcord, 1977) is a headache inducing Christian market knockoff of the Chipmunks franchise. Somehow, Robinson and his hamster forgot about Commandment #8.....
But by 1980, the Chipmunks really needed a makeover and it was up to Ross Bagdasarian Jr. to carry the Chipmunks torch into the '80s. So he created Chipmunk Punk. And yes, even Yours Truly owned a copy.
Chipmunk Punk wasn't actual punk rock music per se. If you came here looking for some hysterical Chipmunk versions of The Sex Pistols, Anti-Nowhere League, The Ramones or The Dead Boys, you better move on.
But you did get Chipmunk covers of rock songs from The Knack (three songs were Knack covers!), Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers, Blondie, The Cars, Billy Joel, Linda Ronstadt and Queen. Sanitized of course (The Knack's "Good Girls Don't" was cleaned up - this is a kids record after all.)
The album was a surprising success and went Gold (the first Chipmunks album to do so.) The album was inspired by a DJ from Los Angeles rock station KMET-FM who played Blondie's "Call Me" at twice normal speed and jokingly called it "the new Chipmunks record".
Chipmunk Punk reintroduced the Chipmunks to a new generation and led to several follow up albums and a new Saturday morning cartoon series in the '80s and they're still active today.
We still don't know. But from the knee-high go-go boots, coloured spandex pants, sequined trench coats and bad face makeup. I'm guessing we're dealing with a "If Peter Criss can do it, we can too!" kind of band.
And from the look and sound of them, that wouldn't be too far off the mark.
Furr comes off like one of those Chinese knockoffs of a famous Western name brand product. And considering 1977 was when Kiss was at the height of their careers and the similarities of Kiss and Furr's logos, it only made one wonder.
This album was produced by legendary bubblegum pop producers Jerry Kasenetz and Jeffery Katz (Ohio Express, The Kasenetz-Katz Singing Orchestral Circus, etc.) for the New York based label Magna-Glide. Not much is known about Magna-Glide either except they did sign '60s R&B singer J.J. Jackson to the label in the mid-'70s and they were distributed by London Records.
But there was just simply no way Furr could ever compete with the stratospheric popularity of Kiss at that time. And this was Furr's only known album.
It's 1985 and you're flipping through the late night TV channels, looking for a late movie or some kind of background noise to do whatever else. And you land on some crazy local UHF TV channel. Which is showing this infomercial.
Don't forget your "Scream Bag" (Photo: Peter L. Walsh/Baltimore or Less)
It's right here you wonder what the hell you are watching. And who (or what) the hell is Santo Gold? Is it jewelry? Some unknown rock star with a penchant for randomly screaming his own name? A factory with a boiler room office? A wrestling federation? A horror movie? A paper bag? WHAT?
I remember seeing this infomercial back then and for decades and even now, adjectives still fail me. But we aren't over yet. Here's the second half of the infomercial.
- Santo Gold was cheap steel costume jewelry coated with a microscopically thin coating of gold. People who were considering purchasing these things during the infomercial were encouraged to buy larger sets to sell at flea markets (as opposed at real jewelry stores.) They also came in spools to make custom length necklaces.
Phil Spector saw Santo Gold's look on TV, looked in the mirror and had an epiphany.
- "Santo Gold", the alleged rock star was Santo Victor Rigatuso. The creator of Santo Gold (the jewelry) and financier of an upcoming B-horror/comedy movie called Blood Circus. Rigatuso also went by the less ethnic sounding Bob Harris (are you still with me?)
To my knowledge, there were no known documented studio recordings by anyone named Santo Gold in 1985 or before. Nothing on the Billboard Top 40/Album Rock charts or radio playlists of 1984/1985 refer to Santo Gold (there was an album by Santana, but nothing from Santo Gold.) Which makes his credentials as "rock star" a stretch. And his music ("?") wasn't even rock. From the infomercials, the song he sings sounds like a jewelry advertisement as sung by Disco Tex & The Sex-O-Lettes.
- Blood Circus was the movie that was to spread the Santo Gold gospel to the masses (once the infomercial blitz had paid off, I assume.) The plot was this; Alien wrestlers come to Earth to fight human wrestlers and promptly devour them before defeating them (rather than the more traditional method of defeating them before devouring them.) The movie was filmed at Baltimore Civic Center (now Royal Farms Arena) and was billed as a wrestling event and movie filming. The audience actually had to pay $10 each to attend. Some bit-part actors were actually paid off only in Santo Gold jewelry!
- The "Scream Bag" was a paper bag.
We don't know much more about this particular mess beyond that. We honestly don't. There are no known copies of the film and what known footage exists only on the scratchy, pixellated YouTube videos of the infomercials.
Some money from the jewelry came in. But by 1987, he still hadn't found any distribution for Blood Circus. He could have also gone straight to the then very lucrative VHS home video market with Blood Circus (which would have been perhaps the best alternate route.) Rigatuso did not. Finally, there was a showing for one week only at selected Baltimore area theatres. But according to one source, only three people showed up; Two reviewers and an extra from the filming.
When Blood Circus failed to get anywhere. Rigatuso later went into finance with a paper credit card for $49.99. Redeemable only for the Santo Gold jewelry he was probably still up to here with by then. He later began advertising alleged $2000 chunks of a millionaire's estate for an unbelievable $52 each.
I guess it was unbelievable, as he was finally convicted of mail fraud in 1989 and sentenced to 10 months in prison. That would be the end of the whole Santo Gold fiasco, right?
Nope.
In 2008 he finally recorded that elusive album we never saw in the '80s, titled I Am The Real Santo Gold. (No word from Slim Shady - aka Eminem.) One of the songs was a tribute to Donald Trump ("You're Fired") and another was titled "Obama Stomp".
In 2009, a female pop singer named Santogold was forced to change her stage name to Santigold, due to legal pressure from Rigatuso.
And then there was this.
There was an ad that appeared on eBay in 2011. The ad was selling a 35mm film copy of the Blood Circus movie. And starting bid was $21 million. Reserve price? $750 million.
Let's simplify this; The 1997 movie Titanic and one of the biggest grossing movies of all time costed $200 million to make. Blood Circus reportedly costed $2 million.
So until there is a complete, viewable and verified print of this film (and expectations considerably lowered.), the legend of Santo Gold's Blood Circus will only remain in cheesy '80s obscurity.
When you think of classical music, K-Tel isn't exactly the first name that comes to mind.
K-Tel, as everyone knows, was the purveyor of microgroove albums of all the pop hits that's print to fit. So what was K-Tel doing messing around with classical music?
The story begins in the UK at the height of the Stars On 45 fad. Louis Clark, former arranger of Electric Light Orchestra had an idea of making a similar medley album, using recognizable pieces of classical music linked together with a disco beat. He thought it could re-energize the classical genre the way the Stars On 45 helped re-energize the Beatles catalog for a new generation. He found an unlikely supporter and partner in K-Tel UK.
UK pressing of Hooked On Classics
However this was far from the first time someone got the idea of blending classical music with contemporary pop music. Since the dawn of pop, classical melodies were used as the framework for many pop songs. Classically styled orchestras called 'Pops' (or "Light") orchestras often made full orchestrated versions of pop music and were staples in the easy listening radio format. Arthur Fiedler and John Williams were the best known conductors of pops orchestras.. The 1960s and '70s were a huge time of classical fusion with pop and rock. Beginning with Simon & Garfunkel, The Moody Blues and various experimental albums using classically styled arrangements of pop hits led to the progressive rock era. And from there, disco was added ("A Fifth of Beethoven" Walter Murphy from the Saturday Night Fever soundtrack was the '70s most famous example. Even leading an aging Arthur Fiedler into the disco age.)
While classical purists loudly condemned this practice, it's worth noting that there was a side benefit. Classical music even then was largely dying as fewer young people were exposed to the music. These albums, for all their campiness and unconventional approaches did introduce classical elements to a newer generation. It may not be your grandpa's classical music, but they illustrated what could be done with it in contemporary music. If they only got that far it was worth it as classical music, while still an increasingly obscure genre and long vanished off commercial radio, is still very much alive and it's influence still occasionally pops up now and then in contemporary pop and rock music.
Hooked On Classics was released in the UK and became a phenomenal smash hit. However in the US, K-Tel needed to get this out to real record stores, as most of K-Tel's product was sold in discount stores. And to the radio stations. RCA had all these connections. So they arranged a distribution deal through RCA Records in the US.
This is K-Tel's only originally produced US Top 40 hit single, making it to #10 in February of 1982.
Hooked On Classics spawned two sequel albums, each selling far less than the first in 1982 and 1983.
Chu-Bops came out in 1980. Their first series consisted of eight different then-current album covers by then contemporary artists including Foghat, The Knack, Pat Benatar, Rush, The Spinners and others.
Each Chu-Bops album sleeve had song lyrics and band bios printed on the back of each cover. They also had an order form on the detachable flap for offers (such a protective case to store your Chu-Bops collection) and fan club memberships.
They came in shrink wrap. The gum was your typical pink hard gum seen in most baseball card packs, but in disc shape. Like a tiny vinyl LP (there was no music stamped into them and you couldn't play them on a record player). On the shelf, they looked like tiny vinyl LPs
Later series included an all Beatles set, and Elvis set and several others until the Chu-Bops line was discontinued in 1983.
Happy St. Patrick's Day!, Today, I thought I'd dig up something from an Irish rock band just about most rock fans in the US have never heard of. But in the pantheon of '70s Irish rock, if Thin Lizzy was on top, then Horslips were in a sound second place. Horslips (yeah, weird name I know. According to Wikipedia, the name originated from a spoonerism on The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse which became "The Four Poxmen of The Horslypse"), while huge in Ireland, were criminally overlooked in America. They only had one LP released in the US in 1977 called Aliens. Aliens came right on the heels of Thin Lizzy's 1976 album Jailbreak album, which went multi-platinum (I'm sensing somebody thought with the Thin Lizzy craze that Irish rock was The Next Big Thing) and while Aliens was Horslips most accessible album commercially, it was largely unheard of in the US. "Sure The Boy Was Green" was the only single from it. Horslips disbanded in 1980.
"Christmas In The Northwest" Brenda Kutz-White (1985)
Now if you're not from the Pacific Northwest area, you probably will not understand this song. Or why Seattle folks still get a lump in their throats whenever they hear it.
Some people say Northwest folks are a proud, almost to the point of smug, bunch. And to be fair, they have a point. We don't have to go far for world class gourmet Asian food. We love our Seahawks, our high octane espresso....
...as well as our insatiable tattoo cravings.
We also got legal bud now too.
But most of all, of the fact we live in an area surrounded by such pristine natural beauty.
Around the holidays, you learn to get a taste for local products like egg nog lattes, Frangos and Almond Rocha. Or if you dare, Aplets & Cotlets. I'm not particularly a fan, but some people have a thing for them.
And Christmas In The Northwest. Which not only became a regional Christmas anthem, it is also the name of a best selling regional yearly album collection in the 1980s through today.
The concept for the album came when Alex Lawson (daughter of Steve and
Debbie Lawson) was admitted to Children’s Hospital at the age of 2,
suffering from E.coli. The Lawsons were so impressed with the treatment
their daughter received, along with the care they received during their
family crisis that they wanted to do something in return for the
hospital.
The Lawsons then owned Lawson Productions; a Seattle based recording
company which later became Bad Animals/Seattle. They enlisted help from
an “A” list of the Seattle music world to provide contemporary Christmas
music for the first and subsequent CDs.
Artists have included Dave Matthews, Ann and Nancy Wilson of Heart...
....Kenny G, Steve Miller, David Lanz and Paul Speer, Tickle Tune Typhoon,
Tim Noah, and Walt Wagner. The first album launched the hit song “Christmas in the Northwest”,
written and sung by Brenda Kutz. That song has become a Northwest
classic.
You probably have heard this song many times on the radio and have utterly no clue what this song is about.
You're not the only one. In fact, almost everyone who's ever heard this song has scratched their heads wondering what this song is about.
For example, here's the opening lyrics:
Hang on, Sloopy Sloopy, hang on Hang on, Sloopy Sloopy, hang on Sloopy lives in a very bad part of town And everybody, yeah, tries to put my Sloopy down Sloopy, I don't care what your daddy do 'Cause you know, Sloopy, girl, I'm in love with you....
HUH?
Sloopy?
Now wait a minute. OK, the song is about a poor girl who "lives in a very bad part of town"
But Sloopy?
Was it a typo? And she was really Sleepy? Or Sloppy? Or even a vague reference to Snoopy, the Peanuts comic dog? Or even Soupy, as in the comedian Soupy Sales?
But even if it was, the song would still be way off. Certainly not the most charming way to seduce a poor girl in even the very worst part of town (try it and see.)
Sloopy?
There aren't any girls whatsoever I can recall even nicknamed "Sloopy". And even fewer who would put up with a guy who would call her that without filing a court order.
Why Sloopy?
So it was finally time to get answers once and for all.
Dorothy Sloop...also known as Dottie Sloop, was an American
jazz pianist. She was born in Steubenville, Ohio and went by the
nickname "Sloopy". During her performing years, she was best known as a
pianist with a number of all (or mostly) female jazz bands in the New
Orleans area, primarily from the 1930s through the 1950s.
She recorded
an album, "Sloopy Time" FeaturingDixie and Sloopy, in 1957 with Yvonne "Dixie" Fasnacht, a jazz
vocalist and clarinetist.
The LP was released on Golden Crest Records. Golden Crest released many albums from C and D List stars as well as countless high school choral and marching band records in the 1950s to the 1970s. It ended as a classical label before folding in 1982.
"Dixie" Fasnacht operated a bar called Dixie's Bar of Music
on Bourbon Street in New Orleans. It was there that Dorothy's acquaintance and co-writer of "Hang On Sloopy" Bert Berns-Russell found the inspiration for the song. During problems with the sound equipment and a crowd getting rowdy, he heard a regular call out to her "Hang on, Sloopy!"
However, The McCoys weren't the first to record this song. It was originally recorded by The Vibrations in 1964 and titled "My Girl Sloopy". It's been performed by hundreds of rock acts, under both titles.
The Vibrations' version charted in the Top 30. After The McCoys version topped the charts, The Ohio State University Marching Band adopted "Hang On Sloopy" as it's theme song (Dorothy Sloop was also an OSU alum.)
Years later Sloopy earned a master's in English from the
University of Florida, and taught special needs children in St. Petersburg. After
retiring, Sloopy moved to Pass Christian, Miss., near her
daughter Jane in Biloxi. A 1983 newspaper interview said her "saloon days" were
over, but she still played gigs on occasion.
Dorothy "Sloopy" Sloop died in 1998. She never earned a penny in royalties from "Hang On Sloopy" and never sought out publicity from the song. Tragically, her personal memorabilia were destroyed in Hurricane Katrina.
I'm not going to spoil it beyond that, but I would put this movie in my Netflix queue if I were you. FM was also the inspiration behind the legendary WKRP In Cincinnati.
FM also had one of the best soundtracks of any movie of the 1970s. It was a compilation loaded with original hits from the original artists on a two LP album set. In their full length album versions, not edited single versions (which besides FM radio's sound quality, the full versions of songs were also what made FM radio great in the 1970s.) And certainly not like a K-tel and Ronco record. The soundtrack was mastered by Gary Katz, the golden ears behind Steely Dan's classic '70s albums. It was truly one of the very best sounding soundtrack albums I have ever heard and MCA Records spared no expense in getting this right.
On the flipside, budget record label Pickwick Records tried to cash in on the popularity of FM's soundtrack with their typically crummy knockoff record of incredibly LOUSY cover versions of the FM soundtrack's hit songs.
....and I do mean lousy.
Listen to this hysterically bad cover of The Eagle's "Life In The Fast Lane"
One of the BEST Halloween variety TV specials of the '70s. Starring Margaret Hamilton (reprising her role as The Wicked Witch from The Wizard of Oz), Betty White, Tim Conway, Roz Kelly, Billie Hayes, Billy Barty, Florence Henderson, an uncredited appearance from Donny & Marie Osmond and musical guest Kiss.
My favourite version of the Peggy Lee classic. Cristina Monet's twisted remake was also featured on the first KROQ Rodney on The Roq compilation (which I believe was the only release of this song in the US.) It was a "mystery" track, final cut on Side 2 and credited to "New York" with the track title "Surprise!"
Play this record at your own risk. Because once it gets inside your head, you can't get it out.
And in a surprisingly good way. The bass and drum playing are insanely catchy, if the lyrics and vocals are simply awful - even for an early bubblegum rock prototype, as this song seems to be.
This 45 was a complimentary extra with the purchase of it's latest colour-coordinated, polyester/cotton blend sportswear line, The Swingers. However I read on WFMU's page on this record that it was an extra with a doll called Bay-Hay Bee Doll. But I've never seen any evidence of this doll (and I really hope such an evil thing does not exist.)
If The Swingers sound familiar, bear in mind there were literally dozens of bands in 1965/1966 called The Swingers, or some variation (The Swingle Singers, The Swingin' Blue Jeans, The Swingin' Medallions, et al.) I'm guessing "swinger" also didn't quite have the sexual connotations at that time that it would be infamous for throughout the '70s.
The song was written by someone named Warren Parker. However, the musician roster on this track as well as any session information have been lost to time (or more likely, never kept. As it was considered a commercial marketing one-off and not a legitimate band.)
The Nu-Disk was a 10" inch extended play mini-album, or EP. It was made mostly as a promotional gimmick for mostly newer rock acts on the label.
However records of a 10" inch size weren't "Nu". In fact, most of the very first 33 1/3 LPs from 1948 to 1955 were 10" inches and that size was actually considered standard and many automatic record changers well into the 1970s had a 10" size selector. But the 12" LP began to overtake the 10" and with the exception of a few rare pressings, the 10" album size was largely retired until Nu-Disk.
Only a handful of titles were released in the Nu-Disk format before CBS retired the format in 1981 due to public indifference. All further EPs were 7" or 12".
